Rapier's Wit

  casinos chat This is one season I can truly admit that I have no favorite. Last year it was clear that I was a complete GLAMBERT.  Really, in all honesty didn't he win? Record sales never lie.  Just ask Chris Daughtry.  Welcome to the finale chat, kids.  I'm armed with store bought limoncello.  This could get scary.

casinos chat Well, it appears the darling of the Great White North will be mentoring tonight. I speak of Shania Twain, of course. Oof! She can teach everyone how to sound like they are having an orgasm while managing to sound like a nagging whiny ass simultaneously. Yeah, she's pretty and all -- Plus, she got cheated on by one of the ugliest men to walk the face of the earth, but I don't dig her tunage. I presume it's gonna be a honky tonkin' country hullabaloo this evening. I wonder how BM (Michael Lynche) will Luther Vandross the hell out of a country song? Will he swagger to and fro to let his balls of steel air out? Y'all know what I'm talking about. Will Lee enlist the help of Bag Pipes? A troup or spoon playin', washboard scrubbin' yee-haw urchins? Will Casey James straighten his hair and put down the broken record of a performance he keeps churning out week after week. If he was fuuuuug-ly he'd be gone by now. Will Siobhan calm the ...

bingo Free chat Adam Lambert mentors. He didn't win Idol. But with this season being so weird, it makes perfect sense for him to do so.  I wonder what he'll do with Siobhan.

online bingo Free chat Make up a chat name and let's go! Put on your snarking caps and let's unleash everything we hate (and love to hate) about American Idol.

No, Adam Lambert didn't technically win American Idol Season whateveritwas.  Kris Allen was crowned the winner.  But he's kind of under the radar right now.  Being runner-up isn't as bad as it may seem, ya know.  This is a track off the John Cusack blockbuster 2012 .  It appears California is crumbling into the Pacific Ocean or something.  It's likely I won't see it until it comes out on dvd and is available on Netflix.  While many of you might not be Lambert fans, I do like his flair.  Yeah, I said it. I do admit the song is a formula tune. It's very Aerosmith circa "Armageddon" love theme, don't ya think? You'd be hard pressed to  find something on the radio that isn't formulaic. Especially when it's being churned out by the American Idol master machine operators.  It'll get plenty of airplay. I'll sing it. Or rather I'll attempt to emulate the wail of Lambert. To anyone over hearing it they might be inclined to call 9...

I just flicked on the radio and the song "Not Meant To Be" by Theory of a Dead Man was playing. I've heard the song before and I've also seen the tail end of the video to find American Idol useless fourth judge Kara DioGuardi is featured in the vid. What struck me interesting is that I thought what I was hearing was that shittastic song DioGuardi co-wrote for the Idol finalists to sing and ultimately record (for the winner). She should "apologize" to Kris Allen for making that his first release. Maybe I'm totally off base, but I did think it. Maybe it's the Adam Lambert version that sounds more like Theory of a Dead Man since his take on it was heavier on the rock. Still sucked. So what is DioGuardi doing in that Dead Man video? Is she shtuping the lead singer? I could look it up on Google, but I have to take a shower.

Well, America has crowned its 8th Idol. The rabidly rapid thumbs of tweens, soccer moms, good old fashioned Christian folk voted for the 23 year old married boy from ... some state that isn't California or Florida. What's his name? I already forgot it. My pick from the auditions was Adam Lambert. I hoped Danny Gokey would have brought new game, but he bored me to death only to awaken me with the guttural growl-howl. See, Adam Lambert possesses that je ne sais quoi that theatre people dig. He proved that he could be the balladeer as well as the Steven Tyleresque rock wailer. I'm not comparing him to rock gods like Steven and surely not Freddie Mercury. Molds were broken when those men were created. However, along the same vein, I believe Glambert will etch himself in similar "rock." Kris Allen (see, I do remember his name, but I wouldn't had he not wooed the fastest texters in the west.) Kris is mister middle of the road. He's a good kid with a good ...

Let's see. What shall I slap out here for your reading pleasure? I logged on to a blog where I often comment to discover I had been either doinked or the comment got lost in the blogosphere. This is a first for me (that I'm aware of). So, it's definitely raised an eyebrow. Rather strange since I saw it there for a couple of hours after making the remark, but I know these things happen. I didn't ask about it. I guess I'll just chalk it up to improper use of an asperand. It seemed fitting since breasts were involved in the post title. I'll file it under: Unsolved mystery (mystery solved. The blog author explained the situation. Do not panic. Do not be concerned. ALL IS WELL good people. ) I met my sister over at her old house to help do more sorting of all things pack-ratted and left behind. I can honestly say it felt like we got little accomplished. I did, however, come home with a couple additions to my wardrobe, martini and wine glasses, and lung full of ick...

I love to snark. I love American Idol. I love Sean Daly's Pop Life blog. Put them all together .... I love to snark about American Idol on Sean Daly's Pop Life Blog. Participating on a blog that is part of a newspaper which is family friendly sets limitations on what you can write. Foul language isn't permitted. Dropping the f-bomb is a big no-no. Expletives in general are snagged by the censors aka the blog police. Some words that many people deem harmless, such as, slang for body parts are slammed down and beaten into submission. For what it's worth, I don't think a lot of people under the age of 21 frequent Sean's blog unless he's writing about his big brother like relationship with the Jonas Brothers. ::fist bump:: I believe it was last week -- it really seems like this season of Idol has dragged on much longer, but alas it's only two weeks in to a long assed journey till the crowning of season 8's most popular performer. Sorry, I'm easily d...

Just when you thought it was safe to return to the truly *cough* talented stage of American Idol, look who rears his fabulously coiffed head: S A N J A Y A! Sorry, he's not ready to be done with his 15 minutes of fame. Per my usual routine in the morning, I checked my emails. Amazon.com likes to give me free MP3s. Do they do that for you, too? More often than not I will take them up on their freebies. I have downloaded some great tracks and some that were more like the aural equivalent to watching paint dry. Sometimes the sample is the best part of the song. It's a risk one takes. It's similar to being all excited over "Don't Mess With the Zohan" based on the trailer. Then, you go and that 30 second trailer was the best parts of the movie. EEK! Today's spotlight freebie is a release from Sanjaya Malakar's CD " Dancing to the Music in my Head." This is the dedication I have to you people. I risked my sanity and my reputation as a totally roc...

I'm an avid American Idol watcher. I wouldn' t go so far as to say I'm a fan. I make fun of the show, the judges, the contestants. I'll give kudos when they actually perform in a manner that will make me stand up and take notice. I might even be accused of lusting after a male contestant I deem worthy of calling eye candy, ie, Michael Johns aka 'Roo. However, his departure gave me no other reason to tune in other than snarking with fellow blog buds on Sean Daly's Pop Life blog. Yeah, good times. This evening, actually, just moments ago, I checked my Myspace account. I read bulletins posted by friends. This one in particular has be baffled. I'm stymied by the content. I can't relate. I'm at a loss for words. The original author wasn't credited in the re-post by my friend Kim. It only said, "thanks DCFP." I'm supposing that means David Cook Fan Page. However, I searched the myspace page by the same name and no blog was posted. I wish ...

I've been watching American Idol season 7 from the beginning. I'm talking about from the God forsaken auditions. I was glued to my television when that feathered fellow sang a song to Simon. I was horrified by the hairy dude in the Princess Leia metal bikini who got waxed in hopes of them taking him seriously. I didn't turn away when the emaciated chick who lived in a studio apartment with 3 cats, 2 dogs and her mother attempted to sing like Janis Joplin and then threw a psycho trip fit when they told her no. I was there. I was blogging live online with Sean Daly and the Pop Lifers -- sounds like a church band, doesn't it? I had no scheduling issues. I seemed to always be off on Tuesdays. Tuesday is the night the kids performed. I worked one Wednesday evening in that entire period. That is until I expressed my desire to be off on Tuesday and Wednesday nights. Then it suddenly became a scheduling issue. While hovering over my supervisor's shoulder I declared, "...

I had some free time. So, I used it wisely by amusing myself. The Legend of Billy Jean is on the tube. I know how it ends. Therefore, I needed additional activity to keep me from eating.

I asked my 13 year old son to poke me with a stick if he caught me falling asleep during the performances by the top 4 contestants on American Idol. I can't believe this is the direction voters have taken. Apparently people are sleep deprived. Obviously I yearn for more entertainment. Clearly America can't choose a proper Idol (much like presidential candidates). What to do? What to do!? By now everybody knows Jason Castro totally obliterated Bob Dylan's Mr. Tambourine Man . Seriously, I think he wants to just go the hell home. He overtly demonstrates that he's just bored with the entire process. The weather back home is probably ideal and he's itchin' to just hang out, dude. I implore the droves of teen voters who text their Castro votes in until their knuckles are bleeding to STOP THE INSANITY! Why, oh why couldn't you have done that for 'Roo? You can't run your fingers through dread locked hair. He admitted one of the tendrils fell OFF during a di...

Per the norm, I'm a day late and a dollar short. This is something I noticed while visiting my favorite shopping site Amazon.com. I think it was Sunday when I was downloading music and I had to chuckle that American Idol 7 front-runner David Cook's digital album was outselling the shriekfest of Mariah Carey. Despite all the advertising for Carey's new E=MC2, AI's resident rocker (and now balladier) was outselling Carey. Funny. A heart kicked an ass. WOOT! So, I have to plead for the reasons why this was done. I've been reading numerous blogs written by AI and David Cook devotees and I have yet to uncover the justification. Tons of speculation, but nothing clear cut. Brooke White and Carly Smithson have digital CDs for sale as of right now. Their tunes have not been pulled. They, of course, were not in the number one position on Amazon's MP3s. Conspiracy? American Idol producers chafed they weren't raking in on the deal? Mariah's people didn't like se...

My luck turned a corner for good. Kristy Lee Cook ? Not so much. Her luck turned down a dark path known as elimination alley. She overstayed her welcome on American Idol 7 . In my opinion she should have been long gone, but she tugged on America's heartstrings and earned a bonified membership to the country club. However, even with all the folk in West Virginia dialing until their fingers were down to nubs, it wasn't enough. She's the latest casualty on AI7. Good riddance! This happens to mark the first night I was correct about the bottom three. I've been putting Kristy Lee as my personal mark for elimination for weeks now. I finally got it right. With this minor run of luck I'm going to buy a Lotto ticket and start planning my trip to Vegas. Had she not been eliminated tonight I was seriously considering hiring a voodoo priestess to help me out. I have a couple other uses for such a person. Perhaps she'd give me a 3 for 1 deal.

It's clear that I'm not fully over the shock of Michael Johns being oddly and suspiciously ousted too soon. Color me a conspiracy theorist on this one. Where's my evidence? I don't need no stinkin' evidence. He's too good to hit the bricks before the pathetic country crooneress Kristy Lee, and far more thrilling and exciting than the dull Brooke White. Regardless, my Roo won't be performing on Idol as a competitor. I just look at this as the faster pace to making his own music with greater control over what goes into his piece of work. This interview will give anyone who hasn't had enough of Michael some morsels to aleviate the fixation ... just a little. Part One: Michael Johns on AI Extra Pt 1 by mjsbigblog Part Two Michael Johns on AI Extra Pt 2 by mjsbigblog

It's done. It's over. I can't believe it. I'm in shock. My 'Roo. My darling Aussie with the bluesy, sensual charm is no longer on American Idol. I'm pissed. I'm miffed. I'm in need of CPR. I need tequila. I need something to help me grasp this totally insane result night. Idiot Kristy Lee Cook continues, but Michael Johns is cast off like Daughtry in season 5. America: You vote like you .. well, vote. I can't believe it. My Roo is gone. On Idol nights I spend the evening snarking with friends from the blogosphere on Sean Daly's Pop Life blog. You can join in, too. It's quite refreshing and cathartic. Tonight, my pals all knew how this would devastate me. In response they offered support and sympathy. Most profoundly expressed was that of Jeff in Cuba. Here is his out-reach for my plight: I'd like to interrupt the snark for my own "Idol Gives Back" message. Hi, I'm Jeff in Cuba. Each year thousands of Midwestern single mother...

This performance left me emotionally drained. I sat numb after seeing and hearing the brilliance that is Annie Lennox. This is a performer. This is how you sing a song. Simplicity, spectacular, soulful.

Carrie Underwood sang this song tonight on American Idol: Idol Gives Back. I am not a CU fan whatsoever. So, I had to cleanse my palate and get the master; the original. Ladies and Gentleman, George Michael. - Praying For Time - These are the days of the open hand They will not be the last Look around now These are the days of the beggars and the choosers This is the year of the hungry man Whose place is in the past Hand in hand with ignorance And legitimate excuses The rich declare themselves poor And most of us are not sure If we have too much But we'll take our chances 'Cause God's stopped keeping score I guess somewhere along the way He must have let us all out to play Turned his back and all God's children Crept out the back door And it's hard to love, there's so much to hate Hanging on to hope When there is no hope to speak of And the wounded skies above say it's much too late Well maybe we should all be praying for time These are the days of the empt...