Rapier's Wit

Holy cats, Batman! 🤯Has it really been 4 years since my last entry? Yes. It is long overdue...much like the Tropic of Cancer in that one Seinfeld episode. Is it ironic that my last post was about working at my local public library?  My gracious! So much has happened since that last post. For one, I no longer work for the library. I do, however, miss the camaraderie of the place and the level of family-like vibe. I worked several jobs and never found a fit. The library was the closest, but I still felt unsettled. Having worked in the same place for 21 years where I felt frustrated and underappreciated may be the reason I just refused to settle. I mean, if I am going to work until the day I die, I better make it a place that sparks joy. My current place of employment provides that and I have the greatest co-worker. That is correct. Singular.  I am co-owner of a resale and consignment shop. It sort of just happened. Working for myself is so different! I've always been employed...

My appearance is pretty rough in this one.  Part of my development and pursuit to happiness is being comfortable with myself.  Vanity is an element that I must face.  So, here I am post Turbo Fire Sculpt 30 workout.  My hair is thinning on the front and sides. I'm aware of it and typically do my hair in a manner which hides the tell-tale signs.  A few days ago the split ends pestered me each time I looked down at the hair laying across my shoulders.  Like an 11 year old the day before picture day, I took matters into my own hands. Armed with cheap barber scissors ... snip. snip. snipsnipsnip.  The following day all the crooked sins were evident.  Snippity snip again.  It's just hair, after all. Mine grows back at an alarming rate. It may be thin, but it grows like weeds.  While I'm on the subject of my hair, I have stopped coloring it.  Well, I've discontinued using a permanent hair color.  Instead, I use an ammonia free wash...

We all have our good days and bad days. The majority, myself included, just keep plugging along despite what our mood may be dictating.  Yesterday was my seventh day in a row to report to work. There is no doubt that I let my disapproval of this scheduling blunder be known at every opportunity.  In the retail world of optics, working five in a row is often pushing the sanity buttons a bit much. I stand for much of my shift, OK? Not to mention, just like anyone's job, there are aspects about the work place that drive me absolutely bonkers given the chance.  That's where I have to take in what is useful and dismiss the rest of the din.  It's difficult particularly when my patience is hanging on a gossamer thread. Sunday brought a disappointing call from my lab partner of the day. She was ill and unable to come to work. Being the super hero that I am, I said I was up to the task.  I've been doing this for 14 years. Grinding lenses can be done in my sleep.  A...

Quite literally today, I gritted my teeth so hard that I'm experiencing pain in my jaw.  I should mention that a dull, throbbing pain was already being experienced thanks to overindulgence of Jelly Belly jelly beans.  Chili mango flavor, if you must know. Hopefully the dentist will see me first thing Monday morning. However, I do think filtering myself increased the discomfort. OK, back to me biting my tongue and gritting my teeth.  As part of a new training process at work, we had to face some truly biting constructive criticism. By 'we' I mean my lab partners and me.  Without going into detail, it required hearing things never brought to our attention in such an open forum. Also, I took it to heart. " This stings! It's what I do for a living and take pride in; however, I appreciate your honesty ."  A tough pill to swallow, for sure. Prior to this training I might have spouted off and went below the line of keeping it professional.  Yeah, imagine me not ...

I do NOT ... I repeat DO NOT LIKE WORKING SUNDAYS!! This is all the energy I can muster.

Nope. I don't care at all.  Monday gets a bad rap because it marks the start of yet another work week or a return to the rigors of school.  That's not the case in my line of work; however, I do feel for my son who has to become vertical after 48 hours of taking the video game posture.  It's interesting to watch him move from the long couch to the loveseat and then, eventually, to the floor where all the back couch cushions have landed. It's a hard knock life for the boy. Working all weekend didn't afford me any time to think.  For those of you who know me well you realize that's a blessing.  It was busy enough to keep me motivated and moving.  With the decrease in spending, we're adjusting accordingly by cutting hours worked.  That means those of us fortunate enough to be working have to kick it up a notch like Emeril. BAM!! And boy did we.  A lot of laughs were had thanks to my hilarious lab partner.  Even while stressed we managed to crac...

TEN HOURS! Work wasn't a busy place, but I still had plenty to keep me relatively busy. I'd like to say my ten hour workday flew by, but it didn't. A slow and steady crawl into clock watcher central. Egads! I'm ready to pull the blankets up to my ears and snooze away the remainder of Glee-day. I'm hoping Thursday will bring me surprises and wonderful news. See, I'm keeping it positive :D My horoscope was a bit weird, by the way. If you think back to a couple days ago, this one makes no sense. The last one I posted assumed I had a lover/significant other. Then, came this: " Fanciful ideas and romantic wishes have been blooming inside your head. They're all so pretty, and it's a waste that no one sees them but you. The time is right to share them with a person who loves you the most: They really want to know more about what makes you tick, and they can tell you've been working on something in your mind. Give them a glimpse of what you'r...

I'm really not 100% comfortable writing about this, but I'm throwing my good sense to the wayside to bask in a mini celebration. Go on and gather up some confetti. In lieu of hole punched colorful paper you can grab dust bunnies, bean bag filler or kitty litter. The point is to join me in gleeful expression. Blondezilla has left the building! I am no fool and we're all fully aware that you must be careful of what you wish for. This isn't something we , as a collective whole, did. SHE patterned her own destiny. Granted, none of us really knows the story of her demise/departure. Sincerely none of us seems to give two hoots and a damn of the why. She sauntered off without a good bye. She packed up her belongings and hit the road. Are we heartbroken? Absolutely not. Well, I guess I shouldn't speak for anyone else. I never kept my loathing for her a secret. We were amiable for the sole purpose of maintaining civility in the work place. That was often a dif...

There's so much to tell. In a previous post I had shared with you that my ex-husband, Mancub's father, wanted to purchase a bicycle for him. Sadly, his dad lost one of his part-time jobs and his finances have suffered. Having discussed in his social studies class the financial crisis our country is experiencing, he quickly accepted the situation and offered a sympathetic word of reassurance that he understood. That's my boy. Who's raising this amazing young man? Wow! Go on. You can say it. Wow! With the best of intentions I told Mancub that I'd find the means to buy him a bike. Summer is quickly approaching and I want him to be able to bask in the sunshine rather than always laying on the couch making time with Cartoon Network and various video games. A trip to the dentist killed any hopes of me buying the 2-wheeled entertainment center. A crown needed to be replaced. Even with insurance it would cost me a cool $600.00. Holy SHIT! Go on. you can say. HOLY S...

I've spent the last couple of days whining and complaining about nearly everything that crossed my path. Like a child tugging on her ear, I should have realized that illness was settling in. Now, I know many of you are accustomed to my cynical and sarcastic method of writing. I do try to weave in humor when I'm bitching and moaning; yet, it's so easy to become settled in that mindset and not get out. What struck me too close to home is expressing joyfulness for absolutely no reason while at work and being accused of being drunk or high. Naturally they didn't really think I was under the influence, but clearly such jovial behavior isn't what they typically see. In my defense, that's a crock of shit. I'm happy a lot of the time, but people tend to ruin the moment with their stupidity. I have a lot of contempt for my job and I don't know why. Let's blame stagnation in order to remove blame from any one specific person whose mere existence annoys...

You could have knocked me over with a feather. Valentine's Day, you know the day I love to hate, turned out to be something fantastic. First came the handmade card from Mancub (Yes Lydia, I will post the real thing soon.) That in itself helped turn the heart-filled day around. Then, I got to work and no one irked me right out of the gate. Again, this is something unprecedented. So, you might want to make a side note on your calendar about that. As many of you know, I am not wholly fond of everyone with whom I work. Go figure! Yeah, like I'm the only person who has daydreams of tripping co-workers and kicking them while they are down. Or, ever so lovingly tapping them with the bumper of my car. Psh! The next thing that helped make the day less regrettable and annoying needs some explaining. So, here goes... A couple of years ago I bought a fellow lab tech a birthday card and passed it around to be signed (we look out for our own unlike the retail staff.) Another birthday rolled ...

You read the title correctly. It's written exactly as I intended. There's nothing mystifying about it. BUTT HOLE. Crass? You bet. I've spent a lifetime attempting to be the good little girl 24/7 and it's given me little less than a mountain of frustration. So, my halo is coming off and I'm revealing my horns. I have said this before and I'll say it again: This is my blog and I get to do whatever I want with it. I've reached that certain age when a woman just doesn't give a damn what everybody else thinks. I'm still a nice girl. This is an instance where I need free reign to express myself. With that out of the way, I will continue to explain what I mean by magic butt hole. For you perverts reading this, it has nothing to do with a sexual act. If you're married or living with someone, I ask you to think back to a time when your loving significant other asked you where his lucky boxers -- or t-shirt --were located. Since you don't wear his lu...

I have learned that fraternizing with co-workers means playing with fire. I don't know how it is in other places of employment, but in my particular setting, there is pettiness and loads of tit for tat mentality. Bonding friendships can be hazardous to one's career and peace of mind. Due to my supervisory position, I am particularly susceptible to having my words and actions contorted. I am not a manager, but associates are still considered subordinates. I have to watch my back. Admittedly, I have slipped and shared more about my personal life than I ought to. Doing so leaves me open and vulnerable. Color me human, I suppose. I haven't gone out drinking or partying with co-workers for the very reasons mentioned above. Proof of such ignorance sits in my personnel file. Dropping the f-bomb frequently when angered and sharing details of sexual liaisons while off the clock; yet with a subordinate proved to be both foolish and detrimental to my mental well-being. For that, I am...

I have serious noggin' throb. I blame the barometric pressure. It seems to have an effect on my cranium. Temperature change? Thump thump thump. I'm sure I need a new mattress. I could use a chiropractor. A massage wouldn't hurt. I have Advil and a heating pad. Sunday was a day of feeling puny. So, much of it was spent on the couch. I was feeling Christmassy for some bizarre reason. The Man-cub and I selected CHRISTMAS VACATION to watch while I zoned out. Boy, did I zone out! I swear the couch injected me with a sleep serum the minute Chevy Chase got the blasted lights to illuminate. I awoke in time for Aunt Bethany to belt out "play ball!" Zoinks!! This morning I awoke feeling relatively well. I sent the boy off to school and got comfy. Where? On the couch, of course. I was cozy with my two faux fur throw blankets and watched Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story. I could have gone the rest of my life not seeing it. The next flick on the mini-screen at casa de Riss? WAR,...

Part 3 in a series of however long it takes me to finish I'm about to tell you another fantastical aspect that helped make my birthday week a banner seven day stretch (and it keeps getting better) was what occurred when I texted a friend and former boss about my date. Whew! That's a winded sentence. The date guy, who shall be referred to as Sum Yung Guy -- SYG for short -- transferred to another location shortly after working with me. I had nothing to do with that, by the way. Another store closer to his home needed a lab technician with experience and we really didn't have the hours to give. My former boss had transferred there, I believe, shortly before that. Former boss, KC, and I got along swimmingly. He called me his right hand. He nicknamed me jukebox and often dropped a quarter in my pocket to encourage me to sing a song. We've remained in contact. First let me say that he was surprised; yet, happy to hear that SYG asked me out. He's a decent dude and every...

There are things in life that leave me with an itchy trigger finger. Well, provided I was a gun owner and/or advocated the use of firearms. I look mild mannered and chipper in my photos. Yet, as of late, I feel like there is a churning pot of lava just waiting to explode from the very depths of my soul. Because the internet is so PUBLIC even when you think you've turned on the privacy preferences, I can't specify why I feel this boiling sense of contempt. I can write this: The amount of stupidity and blatant disregard for others has just been eating away at me. I need to find a happy place. I need to be surrounded by people who actually use more than .5% of their brains. Yes, there is a point in front of that number five. I am so desperately wondering when did it become acceptable to say, "I dunno" and be proud of feigning ignorance. Perhaps these people are truly ignorant. No, ignorant would imply that they simply don't know..they've never been taught; theref...