Rapier's Wit

It is 12: 05 as I begin to write this. A new year has begun. Woo-freakin'-hoo! Once upon a time I viewed each new year as a welcome to hopeful new beginnings. Now, it is more about me screwing up while writing a check. ** The neighborhood yay-hoos are setting off fireworks and it irritates the piss out of me. Loud booms bring me no thrill. I'm overtired which makes Miss Riss a tad cantankerous. I could have waited until daylight to start writing this, but prefer to write while inspired - good or bad . ** Set the bar low and pretty much anything relatively okay equals something faboo except in dating and dining out. 2018 wasn't a total shit show. Early in the year I quit a job that made me absolutely miserable. The people I worked with were, to be blunt, a collection of everything I never wanted to be and prayed I never encounter again. As individuals they may have been acceptable specimens, but together they defined Mean Girls. I walked away from it and have not regre...

A week and a half ago I awoke with pain in my jaw. More specifically, my tooth. This particular tooth has a crown, which by no means equals royalty of the molar world. In the past it has given me a bit of issue, but nothing alarming. X-rays would indicate it was just me clenching my jaw when I slept.In the past, my dentist would readjust it to suit my goofy bite. So, my chemotherapy treatments are scheduled on Wednesdays. Every Wednesday. The treatment I was due to receive is what I call the mega-dyna-whoppin' treatment. That one packs a wallop. Before getting that treatment blood work is done and I meet with my oncologist or nurse practitioner to have vitals checked and to discuss the blood work results. If the stars are aligned then treatment is a go. Sadly, my platelets were not high enough to safely deliver the infusion. So, it had to be postponed. The lighter of the treatments was given with hopes the following week my platelets would be higher. Enter funky tooth. A visit ...

2013 has flown by at lightning speed, it seems. Someone once said that as we age the years tend to do that. Is it because we have little to look forward to or that we are just so much enjoying watching our children grow that we want to savor every second? My money is on the latter. We learn to relish the moments instead of always looking for something better and shiny. OK, mayhaps I cannot speak for you. As for me, I revel in the moment. Most of the time. Well, in retrospect. This year has zipped by, damn it. I don't like it! But here we are... Christmas is just two days away. One day if you're one of those people who doesn't count the day we are in. Changes at work, Mancub being in college... I've been busy and time got away from me. So, there is no card of any sort being sent out. On Facebook, I promised a blog post Christmas card. Even that nearly got away from me.  Today, I'm off from work. Because the month managed to be shorter, somehow, gifts for ...

This looks nothing like my dental experience...the chair is all wrong Today was our sixth month cleaning at the dentist. The folks there always treat us as if they see us weekly. I don't know if they keep dossiers on their patients or they are just that good. Granted, we have been going to this particular dentist for quite a few years. Still, considering we only see him every six months or so, he remembers conversations we've had. That brings me to today's chat with the dentist. After the hygienist picked, flicked, flossed and polished my choppers, dentist extraordinaire came in asking if I was still doing the Beachbody thing. After referring to my pudginess with an uncomfortable chuckle, I told him no. See, we'd babbled between drilling and filling (and other dental things that might sound sexual), we discussed what was once my weight loss success. I guess when a person is stretched back in a chair with a light shining in their face, weight loss is noticeable.....

Mrs. Rose Barton was (she has retired) the Special Education resource teacher at Mt. Vernon Elementary when Mancub first met her. She swiftly consulted with me; arranged consult with the child psychologist at the school; set up observation of Mancub for herself and the child psychologist. It was determined that my darling son was certainly mis-categorized as EBD (emotional behavior disorder) by his former school. Both professionals determined that he was not acting out and perseverating to gain control. His surroundings were setting it off and he was clearly frustrated and upset. Not an expert in the field of autism, Mrs. Barton sought out help from her colleagues and researched Asperger Syndrome. When she first approached me about the possibility my son was 'special needs' I'll admit to feeling defeated and devastated. No lying. Immediately, I pictured my child being harassed and bullied for being different. I made some phone calls to friends and family members who were ...

April is Autism Awareness Month. My son has autism spectrum disorder / Asperger Syndrome. Giggling Mancub age 4.  I truly dislike tagging a label on him. To me, he is perfection. When someone pats me on the back for being a good mother I joke that God knew I'd be raising my son alone and provided me with a child who is easy to raise. When Mancub was in pre-school it was obvious he had issues not adhering to some guidelines. Quick change of schedule or altering the food menu would cause a melt down. He never had such tantrums when we were one on one so it made little sense to me. Then again, I am a creature of habit. It was rare for us to deviate. Once, he 'lost his mind' -- their words--  when they had to do self portraits and he colored his eyes green. His eyes are chocolate brown. The teacher argued with him that his eyes were not green. They had him look in a mirror to prove him wrong. He insisted that his eyes couldn't be brown because "Mommy has g...

A few months ago I landed on Wiki-How thanks to a link on Pinterest. As a result of that I began following Wiki-How on Twitter. Now and then, I click the link. There are some useful things and others are simple things that one might assume everyone knows how to do. For sake of experimentation and boredom, I searched what I think is the simplest thing on Earth to make: A peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Wiki-How did not disappoint. It has instructions complete with photographs. It, however, uses the wonkiest piece of bread they could find. I'd post the actual photo of said wackadoo slice of bread, but I'd probably be violating some copyright and I can't even afford to pay GoDaddy! to use my other blog let alone some legal fees to defend my intention to merely point fingers and laugh rather than steal. OK, this is the link to the Wiki-How to make a PB&J . Did you check it out? Scroll all the way down and they've added how to really jazz up your sandwich, as w...

This morning came knocking early.  It was exactly 4:17 AM when my body told me to wake up.  After doing what necessitated my way-before-sunrise wakening, sleep was attempted once more. Silly me.  I should know me better than that. At precisely 4:59 AM, reluctantly throwing in the towel for more slumber, I felt around for my cozy sweater and fuzzy slipper socks.  It's astounding what super powers one possesses in the dark. Rather than sit with my coffee perusing the countless paid programming/infomercials available, I decided it was time to put fingers to keyboard and write something.  I'd thought about just slapping up the video I made and posted on youtube yesterday.  This post is really an expansion of what is touched on in the nearly 5 minute video. It's available for viewing after the text. It won't be long and the new year will have been rung in.  For some of you it'll be a fond farewell to a year that didn't deliver what you'd hoped it would....

Here I am noshing on a Honeycrisp apple. If you've never eaten one then you're truly missing out on one of nature's most delightful snacks. But that is not what this post is about.  Nope. I just wanted to explain the reason my keyboard is sticky -- an excuse for my typos, by the way. I worked all day and it wasn't until around 4:30 that I was struck with a serious case of the yawns.  My sleepiness can be blamed on staying up later than my usual 10:30 PM bedtime.  I know! Outrageous party animal am I!  It was around 12:30 AM when my phone was going dead for the second time. Obviously the cosmic gods were telling me to go to bed. You see, Saturday night brought some serious catch up with the best friend I've never met.  My house phone battery went belly up -- yes, I'm a weirdo with a land line. Immediately after that I grabbed my cell which had been charging.  I knew my Blondie gal in Cali and I had babbled and laughed for a few hours.  It wasn't unti...

My appearance is pretty rough in this one.  Part of my development and pursuit to happiness is being comfortable with myself.  Vanity is an element that I must face.  So, here I am post Turbo Fire Sculpt 30 workout.  My hair is thinning on the front and sides. I'm aware of it and typically do my hair in a manner which hides the tell-tale signs.  A few days ago the split ends pestered me each time I looked down at the hair laying across my shoulders.  Like an 11 year old the day before picture day, I took matters into my own hands. Armed with cheap barber scissors ... snip. snip. snipsnipsnip.  The following day all the crooked sins were evident.  Snippity snip again.  It's just hair, after all. Mine grows back at an alarming rate. It may be thin, but it grows like weeds.  While I'm on the subject of my hair, I have stopped coloring it.  Well, I've discontinued using a permanent hair color.  Instead, I use an ammonia free wash...

The title of this post is a comment that a friend sent to me on Facebook. I started a Marissology fan page and sent out invites for people to join. I suspect this friend saw new photos of me. The play on words caused me to laugh my ever decreasing tushy off. I won't call him out on it since he did send his thoughts in a private message, but it was just too cute for words not to share. I do havesome BIG! Ginormous!! HUGE-GANTIC!! news to share. Kind of ironic considering the gargantuan news is about something getting smaller.  Yes, another weight loss update. *cartwheel* Today, August 29, 2010 I stepped up on the scale to have it remain for a week solid on ....... never mind the number.  It tells me that I have lost FORTY POUNDS of back fat, booty slap, jiggling cottage cheese and BINGO! wings since my decision to get healthy began with three shakes a day for 3 days with Shakeology on the 3-day Cleanse. It has not been easy.  There is absolutely no sense in tryi...

this style available through Beachbody As you know I am using the newest Beachbody workout program called Turbo Fire . It is intense. HIIT -- High Intensity Interval Training -- workouts fire up calorie burning like none other.  I love it.  Prior to using this program I used Power 90 (the pre P90X workout by Tony Horton ) and Turbo Jam by Chalene Johnson.  Both programs provided effective sculpting workouts that really gave my shoulders, back and biceps definition.  Sure, there's a layer of fat so it makes me seem more bulky.  I have no doubts the muscles will be lean and sexy through diet and increased cardio workouts.  Turbo Fire incorporates sculpting and toning, too.  It's not all high intensity cardio, but that is a primary focus.  Here's the hitch:  On the DVD they use resistance bands.  I do not like them for arm work. They have a great place when I'm on the floor and using them for rowing or core strengthening, but, for ...

OK, it's no secret that I'm on a journey to get fit; get healthy; lose weight.  Jeepers! I talk about it ad nauseam. On March 27 I made a commitment to help rid the world of obesity.  Naturally that vow had to start at home.  Yesterday was one day past laundry day.  That means I had run out of pants to wear to work.  EEK! With that mind, it meant having to wear that one pair of trousers that I dislike.  This particular pair was always just shy of being high-waters. Additionally, they sit just below the natural waistline which, unfortunately at my weight, caused the spectacular cascade of muffin toppery.  Yes, such a lovely look on a 44 year old woman.  In wintery sweater weather it wasn't so bad because bulky cable knits or a jacket covered up the embarrassing feature. Alas, I couldn't call in sick from work or wear jeans because everything else was dirty.  At least I had clean underpants.  First I was able to pull the pants up witho...

" There is no hope for a civilization which starts each day to the sound of an alarm clock."  ~Author Unknown Today I made myself stay in bed longer than my usual 5:30AM get up time. Maybe you have one of those nagging internal alarm clocks, too.  It's not like you can smack  yourself on the forehead and shut it off for 10 minutes.  Even if you could that seems like a rather foolish notion.  Despite the sun peeking through the drapes, I laid there determined to snooze in.  Roll to the left; pull the covers up higher. Roll to the right; slide the pillow over my eyes.  No point in all that movement and not be getting some cardio benefits. That brings me to the question: When do you work out? Are you a hit the floor running type of exerciser? Do you need to settle in to the morning and then get to it (like me)? Do you prefer mornings but can't fit it in so you take care of the work out when you finish the work day? For me, waiting means my legs feel li...

It started to set in last night.  I knew it was taking a toll while viewing "American Idol."  Wednesdays are elimination night. Quite frankly, there is little concern from this mommacita as to who is sent packing with their dreams tucked in their carry-on baggage.  This year isn't even snark worthy as years past have been. Sad, really. Sad. That brings me to my mood that began last night.  It came from nowhere... much like the alien monster that threatens mankind in the B-movies of the '60s.  When the results show on Idol came down to Big Mike Lynche or Crystal and they told the dred-locked not full of the mange single mom, I almost wept.  I-DO-NOT-CARE! And that was all the indication required for me to know I was spiraling into despair (hyperbole). As with all things Marissa, I had to analyze my dilemma.  There could have been a variety of reasons but nothing stuck out like that proverbial sore thumb.  Some possibilities were: I'm missing t...

The title of this post is a phrase often used online when someone makes a claim of a certain situation taking place.  "I just saw a woman wearing a poodle on her head." That sort of thing warrants a pics or it didn't happen reply. Since March 27th, I have been using Beachbody's Power 90 In-Home boot camp with Tony Horton.  Whenever I work out, I log on to Team Beachbody and click Super-Gym WOWY ( W ork O ut W ith Y ou). It's an ideal way to track your workouts.  The website is designed to support members (free, by the way) while they strive to achieve their goals for better health and fitness.  In fact, any program you purchase from Beachbody will remind you to log on to WOWY before the work-out starts.  Pretty fab, if I do say so myself.  Thanks to that awesometastic feature, I know that I've worked out 32 times with Tony Horton and 'the kids.'  After last night's Phase 3-4 Sweat and Ab Ripper 200 routine, I decided it was time to put my money w...

You'll notice that some things have erupted on my page. Those things are ads. Those ads are placed there based on what I'm writing about. For me, it's a no brainer. Hopefully those ads will drive a little chunk of change toward my wallet. Yes, I'm monetizing my blog. The first ads that popped up are for a Beachbody product called P90X. It's a kick-ass, get your body ripped program. Did you know you can purchase it (and many other fabulous fitness programs and supplements) through me as your personal Beachbody Coach. The link in the banner of this blog will take you there! I'm very excited about this new venture. Amazon.com is one of my favorite sites. I often post on Facebook what values I find there particularly in regards to music. You'll get the best of both worlds: My blog and shopping on Amazon simultaneously! It's a multi-tasker's dream come true. Haha. I do believe I'm getting the hang of this dramatic lifestyle change. Since I first ...

As I write this it's only 6:30 AM of day two of my Shakeology 3-Day Cleanse. But I've already worked out and had a green berry Shakeology drink as a post workout recovery supplement. Prior to working out I had two glasses of water. Additionally, I ate a banana. That's one of two snacks I'll have today.  I may regret not saving it for later. However, at the time I was feeling a tad squonky. Without any caffeine yesterday, I thought for certain I'd feel like hell by night fall and cheating (myself) by getting a Diet Coke.  Wrong. To my amazement and delight, I had no headache at all nor did I feel drained of energy or cheated in any way, shape or form. What the hell!? Back in 1993 when I found out that I was pregnant, I had been a pot o' coffee a day girl. A three cans of diet soda in addition to the coffee kind of girl.  I went cold turkey from caffeine and thought for certain I was going to die due to the withdrawl from addiction.  The migraines were unbeara...

A week or so ago I ordered a wonderful product called Shakeology .  This product is a meal replacement unlike anything else you'll buy at the store. First of all, it tastes good and doesn't give me the burps like so many of those other ones on the market. There's also no artificial sweeteners, caffeine free and gluten free. Right on the bag it says "optimal health in a glass."  My son even loves the chocolate flavor and it's a perfect start for his morning. Instead of making it with water, though, it's mixed with 1% or fat free milk. He's a complete chocoholic and often has no appetite before school. So, he opts for chocolate milk. Well, now he gets the best of both worlds. And I feel better knowing he's getting better nutrition.  This time around Green Berry was also purchased. It's rather tasty, too. When I mentioned on Facebook having finally received my shipment just in the nick of time for my tooth to act up, an online friend and Beachb...

You all know, by now,  that I'm trying to get healthy and, in turn, lose weight.  It's not that I feel awful or have major health issues, but there's no doubt that improvement can be made on my overall state of mind, energy level and physical appearance.  Only moments ago a thought jumped into my head as I went to the kitchen to get breakfast (a blend of Chocolate and Banana Nut Cheerios).  Do thin people -- those who've never battled the bulge or suffer from eating disorders -- do they think about food even when they aren't hungry? Obviously planning dinners etc are expected. Do they consciously choose something healthy even though they are craving a piece of pineapple upside down cake or a bacon & blue cheese-half pound burger? Or, do they just eat what they want but naturally stop before they are full?  Is eating what they want in moderation something innate or a conscious choice? I'm convinced there is, in my case, some childhood psychosis attached to ...