Larry the Cable Guy did it ...
...so can I. Actually, Larry isn't the inspiration behind this at all. I just wanted to put something that's probably highly searched on the web so my blog gets hits. People will think they are going to find a "Git R Done" homage and they find my sexy pin up girl blog banner instead. Sorry! Well, not really. Maybe they'll like what they read. Chances are that someone who likes Larry will also appreciate the curvy form of a 40s goddess.
What I'm really here to write about is my jump-head-first into changing my life. Earlier on in my blogging here I wrote about how 2008 was going to be the Year of The Riss. I haven't really done much to prove that. Like so many resolutions before it, I lost sight of what I meant or intended. It doesn't take much to throw me off track. I have a lot of ooh! something shiny moments.
I had a friend who told me he had a friend who worked high on the food chain with NutriSystem --sounds shady already, doesn't it? He insisted that he could get me food for pennies on the dollar. Here's the short version: I received some food from my friend, but it was the OLD NutriSystem Nourish style and most of it was expired. The shelf life had long been past. I should also mention that the boxes reeked of gag-me-with-a-spoon mildew. It hit me like a whif of sewer gas. I was certain that the only way I'd lose weight with that was from a serious case of botulism. No thanks. I like my intestines intact. I'm sure his intentions weren't to kill me; however, I declined further random shipments from my 'friend'.
It wasn't long ago that I received an encouraging email from my brother. He and I have recently reconnected and have been developing a new relationship. He and his family visited in early January of this year. I hadn't seen my big bro in nearly 9 years. In fact, the last time we were in the same location it was due to our father's funeral. It sounds ridiculous, but circumstances being what they are/were, we were just never in the same place at the same time. I'm telling all of this to lay the ground work for a p.s. that was included in one particular email. He expressed his concern about my weight. He added that he feels I am beautiful, but worries that I am not caring for myself well enough to do what I can for a longer life. The gist of it was Man-cub needs you. Initially his words stung like a giant black hornet, but he is right.
This morning, I was reading Citizen Jane's blog. I knew that she was using NutriSystem, but I wasn't aware of anything more than that. I had no idea when she started or how much she'd lost as a result. She rightfully boasted about wearing capri pants that were two -- count 'em -- onetwo sizes smaller than those she wore in December when she started the program. T W O SIZES!! I have no idea nor concern for her starting point. That's all the inspiration I needed to stop what I was doing and head on over the NutriSystem website for more information.
When I got there, Larry the Cable Guy was staring at me. It was as if he was daring my rather robust and rotund self to attain the goal he reached. I hate; no, I loathe the phrase he is famous for using. It annoys the hell out of me to hear him say it ... let alone every man, woman and child who watches NASCAR. I digress.
Now, I've seen the advertisements on the telly. I even tried NS way, way back in the day when you had to report weekly, weigh in, pray not to be scolded for not losing enough and THEN ante up a large sum of cash for really shitty tasting food. I actually ended up spending three times the amount I normally would on food. This was over 20 years ago, by the way. I was living on a pittance of a salary. Even though I make quite a bit more now, I will still have to cut back in other areas (fast food/take out). I also have a rapidly growing 13 year old son to support. I'm investing in our future. I can't do this alone. I lack sensibility regarding healthy food choices. I know what to do, but I am lazy. I can't take an apathetic approach to my own existence. That's just crazy thinking!
I took a giant leap and signed up. I placed an order. I have received confirmation. I am on my way. I've added my Leslie Sansone Walking For Weight Loss to my iPod. I'm pretty well set. All I need to do now is lift my wide derriere from this chair and get moving!
What I'm really here to write about is my jump-head-first into changing my life. Earlier on in my blogging here I wrote about how 2008 was going to be the Year of The Riss. I haven't really done much to prove that. Like so many resolutions before it, I lost sight of what I meant or intended. It doesn't take much to throw me off track. I have a lot of ooh! something shiny moments.
I had a friend who told me he had a friend who worked high on the food chain with NutriSystem --sounds shady already, doesn't it? He insisted that he could get me food for pennies on the dollar. Here's the short version: I received some food from my friend, but it was the OLD NutriSystem Nourish style and most of it was expired. The shelf life had long been past. I should also mention that the boxes reeked of gag-me-with-a-spoon mildew. It hit me like a whif of sewer gas. I was certain that the only way I'd lose weight with that was from a serious case of botulism. No thanks. I like my intestines intact. I'm sure his intentions weren't to kill me; however, I declined further random shipments from my 'friend'.
It wasn't long ago that I received an encouraging email from my brother. He and I have recently reconnected and have been developing a new relationship. He and his family visited in early January of this year. I hadn't seen my big bro in nearly 9 years. In fact, the last time we were in the same location it was due to our father's funeral. It sounds ridiculous, but circumstances being what they are/were, we were just never in the same place at the same time. I'm telling all of this to lay the ground work for a p.s. that was included in one particular email. He expressed his concern about my weight. He added that he feels I am beautiful, but worries that I am not caring for myself well enough to do what I can for a longer life. The gist of it was Man-cub needs you. Initially his words stung like a giant black hornet, but he is right.
This morning, I was reading Citizen Jane's blog. I knew that she was using NutriSystem, but I wasn't aware of anything more than that. I had no idea when she started or how much she'd lost as a result. She rightfully boasted about wearing capri pants that were two -- count 'em -- onetwo sizes smaller than those she wore in December when she started the program. T W O SIZES!! I have no idea nor concern for her starting point. That's all the inspiration I needed to stop what I was doing and head on over the NutriSystem website for more information.
When I got there, Larry the Cable Guy was staring at me. It was as if he was daring my rather robust and rotund self to attain the goal he reached. I hate; no, I loathe the phrase he is famous for using. It annoys the hell out of me to hear him say it ... let alone every man, woman and child who watches NASCAR. I digress.
Now, I've seen the advertisements on the telly. I even tried NS way, way back in the day when you had to report weekly, weigh in, pray not to be scolded for not losing enough and THEN ante up a large sum of cash for really shitty tasting food. I actually ended up spending three times the amount I normally would on food. This was over 20 years ago, by the way. I was living on a pittance of a salary. Even though I make quite a bit more now, I will still have to cut back in other areas (fast food/take out). I also have a rapidly growing 13 year old son to support. I'm investing in our future. I can't do this alone. I lack sensibility regarding healthy food choices. I know what to do, but I am lazy. I can't take an apathetic approach to my own existence. That's just crazy thinking!
I took a giant leap and signed up. I placed an order. I have received confirmation. I am on my way. I've added my Leslie Sansone Walking For Weight Loss to my iPod. I'm pretty well set. All I need to do now is lift my wide derriere from this chair and get moving!
*throws confetti in the air*
ReplyDeleteI'm so proud of you! And thrilled that I have a buddy to go through this with -- we can form our own Love Kangaroo/NutriSystem Club.
Hey -- this worked for Larry the Cable Guy. And Tony Orlando. And Tori Spelling. And Mr. and Mrs. Don Shula too! So it can work for us as well.
I'm pretty jazzed about it right now. Of course, I haven't started eating 'their' foods. Maybe you can tell me your faves and what really is awful to feast on.
ReplyDeleteI do believe knowing a real person who is on it will be a great aide. I'm never sold on celebs doing something. They are usually compensated.
Here's to smaller fannies and Love Kangaroos
Good for you, that's cool that you are starting Nutrisystem. I read an article today about how strokes have tripled in the last ten years in women 35 to 55, due to "abdominal obesity". Scared the mess out of me, as I am a waddling poster child for that term. I'm not on Nutrisystem, but I've been following the American Heart Association diet for about a week, maybe we can all support each other in this fight.
ReplyDeleteI have found that support from women on the pathway to lifestyle changes is the best means of cheerleading.
ReplyDeleteI don't want to continue on this road of aches and pains ::as I shove a chocolate covered Gummi Bear in my pie hole::
Big hug, you guys! How great to have a support system. We can do this!
ReplyDeleteAnd I was being really facetious listing all those 'celebrities' -- total eye roll stuff. Is Tori Spelling even a d-list celeb these days?
Maybe she's a D-cup lister, but that's about it.
ReplyDeleteRecommendation: Florentine Sauce with Chicken Fettuccini. Yummy, rich, creamy. Good with green beans on the side.
ReplyDeleteFor what it's worth, I can't think of a scenario where I'd need to be Googling "Larry The Cable Guy" but if I ever did and wound up seeing the lovely lady on your masthead, I'd consider it an upgrade.
ReplyDeleteClark, you are such a sweet talker or a smooth dude. Which ever, thank you.
ReplyDeletePlenty of people Google Larry, I'm sure. NASCAR has millions of fans. I think it all goes hand in hand. lol