Rapier's Wit

I'm prone to being obnoxious when I feel good. So, pardon the exclamation point in the title. Oh, don't confuse me with the eternally perky girl who appears to be on happy pills 24/7. It's not that disgusting.  The month of March is nearly over. How fast it flies by when you're having fun. Ha ha.  The weather forecast is calling for warmer temperatures this weekend. WOO! We're talking hitting the 70s in early April. Easter might prove to be absolutely fantastic egg hunting weather.  Mancub and I skipped decorating eggs last year.  The same will probably occur this year.  He's never really been into the activity.  His favorite egg hunting treasures were the plastic eggs filled with treats. It's always about the candy with that boy. What's really thrilling about the coming week (following Easter) is that I'm taking time off from work. Not just a day or two, but an entire week -- with exception to Thursday, ugh.  Long story.  While spending tim...

Today is day two of my body transformation. OK, before going on I have to say something to you, my reader. Please do not to turn away if you've come here hoping I'd be blathering about my personal life (this is my personal life for now). That day will come again when striving to achieve a healthier body is more knee jerk than something I have to maintain focus upon.  This is my way of keeping accountable. YOU are part of my process. Thanks so much for your participation. Day 1 of Power 90 forced me to dig really deep to find the drive and determination to try each sculpting movement with the suggested minimum number of reps.  Without the help of Mancub I might not have made it through.  He's my in-house coach.  Normally on Saturday he sleeps in. It's a stroke of miracle to see him before the clock strikes 11:00 AM. Yesterday he was up before I'd begun my first workout with Tony Horton. Enlisting his help in tracking reps, I grabbed water and a towel.  Mancub...

WOW! Today is amazing. Not only is the sun shining, but there's a light emitting from my very core. I lost two pounds! What's kooky is that when I needed to get dressed I grabbed a pair of jeans that have been very snug and wearing them proved to be less than comfortable. Previously, there was no room for anything between me and my Faded Glorys. No room to breathe easily when sitting down, either. I'm certain the restricted blood flow wasn't conducive to leg circulation. Today those suckers fit loosely. Bending over didn't make me gasp for a breath. When I sat down the button didn't impale my navel nor was a kidney displaced when I had to squat down to pick something up off the floor. This is no doubt proof that treating my body like a treasured work of art is working.  This is such a major reward for my efforts to date. It makes me look forward to the next weeks and months ... the rest of my life. Another bit of fantastic news is in regards to Mancub. Toda...

You'll notice that some things have erupted on my page. Those things are ads. Those ads are placed there based on what I'm writing about. For me, it's a no brainer. Hopefully those ads will drive a little chunk of change toward my wallet. Yes, I'm monetizing my blog. The first ads that popped up are for a Beachbody product called P90X. It's a kick-ass, get your body ripped program. Did you know you can purchase it (and many other fabulous fitness programs and supplements) through me as your personal Beachbody Coach. The link in the banner of this blog will take you there! I'm very excited about this new venture. Amazon.com is one of my favorite sites. I often post on Facebook what values I find there particularly in regards to music. You'll get the best of both worlds: My blog and shopping on Amazon simultaneously! It's a multi-tasker's dream come true. Haha. I do believe I'm getting the hang of this dramatic lifestyle change. Since I first ...

It never fails that when I have the opportunity to sleep in it's physically impossible to do so. There were birds wildly chirping outside my bedroom window. They were doing so probably in protest to the dramatic dip in temperature. Very windy. It's a day where it's 34°F but feels like 22°F thanks to our winter friend the wind chill factor. Quite frankly, that wind chill can kiss my left butt cheek. I'm so over winter. Unfortunately, it chooses to be a stalker who can't adhere to an order of protection. Lucky for me, today is a day of non-workery. My hazelnut coffee was set to brew at 6:15 AM. It's my one vice that I have elected not to give up. That magical beverage is no longer accompanied by creamer or artificial sweeteners.  Egads, you say! What? Yep. Black coffee with a touch of sugar or agave nectar* . After watching an episode of The Dr. Oz Show where he discusses the use of artificial sweeteners and how the brain reads them in your system, I decided ...

This week I have had to really push myself.  What's funny about that is knowing I can dig a little deeper and push harder.  The weight isn't melting off as I had hoped it would, but I suspect my body is in shock with all the goodness it's receiving.  In response, it's going into salvation mode. However, it will adjust to all the vegetables, fresh fruit and cardio. I have faith that it will. Tracking my food (protein, fat, carbs & calories), water intake, exercise etc... will get me where I want to be. I've totally given up diet sodas! That's such a huge win for me.  Even if I did only lose 1 pound this week, the fact that I didn't drink soda fills me with a great sense of accomplishment. Rather than leaving it up to the programs on the Wii, it's become apparent that I need to rev up my workouts by varying my routines with Beachbody's Turbo Jam , Hip Hop Abs and power walking (the weather has been perfect). I recognize that the soreness I feel ...

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Yep. Spring forward. Blech. I always get so messed up when we have time changes. I can't understand how people who travel to and from different time zones don't lose their minds. Typically turning the clocks ahead one hour doesn't bother me unless I work that Sunday. Which, tomorrow, I do. Blech. I said that already. At least I'm working with someone who makes me laugh my tushy off even when we're stressed and pissy. The clocks and time aren't the only things on the horizon that are changing.  I am.My thoughts about my health are so different then they were two weeks ago. I don't understand it, but there's no question that I'm embracing it. When I awoke today, I didn't sit down at the computer and lolly-gag until I needed to shower and get ready for work.  Instead, I worked out on the Wii. More proof that old habits are fading as new ones replace them. Pizza from Papa John's was purchased for the employees.  I love, LOVE that pizza an...

The weather forecast on Friday called for rain in the afternoon.  There was a glint of sunshine peeking through the clouds.  Since it was my day off, I took advantage of the vast amount of time at my disposal. Rather than lay out on the couch watching reruns or movies, out I went into the cool temps.  With my iPod in place, shoes laced and bras doubled up, I headed to the walking track. Quickly the pace of the music pushed me and it felt good to be outside filling my lungs with air. Gone are the 25°F temperatures. Spring is in the air and in my steps. The particular playlist of music pulsating from my ears to my toes is designed for walking workouts for women. The beginning warms me up on my short walk to the track nearby. By the time my first foot touches the track, my cadence is set for the more intense rhythm.  Around the track I go. Heart rate increasing.  The song changes. Its title is 'Angels Fly.' As I near the back side of the track (furthest from the ...

Yes, weigh! After three days on the Shakeology cleanse, my weight lost total is SIX AND A HALF POUNDS . I'm feeling quite well and energetic today. Most of the cleansing plans I've read about advise participants not to do anything strenuous. Also, they caution not to be too far away from a bathroom. One actually suggested wearing dark pants and carry a change of clothes in case of an accident (eww).That is not the case of Shakeology. In fact, it's not a gastrointestinal attack or cleanse of that nature. It's a whole body cleansing of toxins built up from all the funky crap I was putting in my body only days ago. Because I don't work until later today, there was plenty of time to do some much needed housework.  A week ago I might have returned to bed or passed out on the couch while watching some nutty, craptacular programming on the telly.  But something strange had over come me -- energy.  I wanted to move and do stuff that didn't involve stuffing food in m...

It's nearing the end of my Shakeology 3-Day Cleanse.  It's been quite a trip.  I caved and had a small cup of black coffee.  My head was pounding and even with the 800 mg of Ibuprofen I've been taking, it wasn't going away. Once the coffee was in my system the headache went away along with my crankiness.  The good news is that this has proven that weening off the Joe won't be too difficult. My enjoyment of that hot beverage each morning is something to be missed. Therefore, decaf will be purchased for future consumption. As of the start of day three, I had lost FIVE pounds. Drinking water has replaced the Diet Cokes. Bloating is reduced, as well. While this might fall under the TMI category, I'm going to tell you anyway.  It's PMS time and where I'd normally feel aggravated and ill tempered, I'm feeling more controlled and happy.  My stress level is way down on the chart.  So, I got that goin' for me -- which is nice. I'll tell you someth...

As I write this it's only 6:30 AM of day two of my Shakeology 3-Day Cleanse. But I've already worked out and had a green berry Shakeology drink as a post workout recovery supplement. Prior to working out I had two glasses of water. Additionally, I ate a banana. That's one of two snacks I'll have today.  I may regret not saving it for later. However, at the time I was feeling a tad squonky. Without any caffeine yesterday, I thought for certain I'd feel like hell by night fall and cheating (myself) by getting a Diet Coke.  Wrong. To my amazement and delight, I had no headache at all nor did I feel drained of energy or cheated in any way, shape or form. What the hell!? Back in 1993 when I found out that I was pregnant, I had been a pot o' coffee a day girl. A three cans of diet soda in addition to the coffee kind of girl.  I went cold turkey from caffeine and thought for certain I was going to die due to the withdrawl from addiction.  The migraines were unbeara...

A week or so ago I ordered a wonderful product called Shakeology .  This product is a meal replacement unlike anything else you'll buy at the store. First of all, it tastes good and doesn't give me the burps like so many of those other ones on the market. There's also no artificial sweeteners, caffeine free and gluten free. Right on the bag it says "optimal health in a glass."  My son even loves the chocolate flavor and it's a perfect start for his morning. Instead of making it with water, though, it's mixed with 1% or fat free milk. He's a complete chocoholic and often has no appetite before school. So, he opts for chocolate milk. Well, now he gets the best of both worlds. And I feel better knowing he's getting better nutrition.  This time around Green Berry was also purchased. It's rather tasty, too. When I mentioned on Facebook having finally received my shipment just in the nick of time for my tooth to act up, an online friend and Beachb...

Quite literally today, I gritted my teeth so hard that I'm experiencing pain in my jaw.  I should mention that a dull, throbbing pain was already being experienced thanks to overindulgence of Jelly Belly jelly beans.  Chili mango flavor, if you must know. Hopefully the dentist will see me first thing Monday morning. However, I do think filtering myself increased the discomfort. OK, back to me biting my tongue and gritting my teeth.  As part of a new training process at work, we had to face some truly biting constructive criticism. By 'we' I mean my lab partners and me.  Without going into detail, it required hearing things never brought to our attention in such an open forum. Also, I took it to heart. " This stings! It's what I do for a living and take pride in; however, I appreciate your honesty ."  A tough pill to swallow, for sure. Prior to this training I might have spouted off and went below the line of keeping it professional.  Yeah, imagine me not ...

I didn't steal any cookies. I bought them as I whisked through the grocery store.  My intention was to buy milk, mixed greens and frozen veggies. What I walked out with was that and so much more. My mistake: Entering a grocery store when hungry and tired. Without thinking twice I grabbed home-style peanut butter cookies. At the check out counter I should have asked the clerk to pull them aside and not put them in my cart. But again, I wasn't thinking clearly for various reasons. This morning, in light of recognizing my error, I divided the cookies, put them in zip closure bags and tossed them in the freezer.  Throwing them out is not an option. Diet and exercise gurus might say otherwise, but I beg to differ. Now, by the time the cookie defrosts, my craving for them might pass.  If I still yearn to nosh on the treats, then I'll enjoy each and every nibble without guilt. This morning marked 1000 calories burned on EA Sports Active 30 Day Challenge.  A virtual ...

While perusing my Facebook profile for new comments, I took note of the numerous aggravating ads that take residence on the right side margin. An X is provided to dismiss the advertisement, but not before answering why you don't like it. As soon as you give them reason, another ad pops up in its place and often more misleading or offensive.  One such ad had a header "Classy Cougars." Uh, whoa. Stop right there. Did that ad just call me a skanky, old broad with a little bit of cash, fake tits and the desire to uber hump 25 year old men only for the thrill of the kill? If you haven't guessed it already, I despise the term COUGAR. Loathe it. Regard it with great contempt. Since it is a made up, social term, I turned to Urban Dictionary to find the common definition of cougar .  Not anywhere on the first page does it describe the woman I am.  Far from it and proudly so. For the record, at the time of posting this there are 100 definitions of the older woman on the pr...